Mayan Angelous
From Zanecorpwiki
(02:42:02 PM) John Joseph Bachir: i'm sitting near a couple
(02:42:09 PM) John Joseph Bachir: and one or both of them is deaf or blind
(02:42:16 PM) John Joseph Bachir: i think one is blind and the other is deaf
(02:42:20 PM) John Joseph Bachir: well that was my original theory
(02:42:28 PM) John Joseph Bachir: but then the deaf guy is signing to the blind girl
(02:42:47 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: is he signing in her hand? [Image] (02:42:47 PM) Private conversation with johnjosephbachir@gmail.com/Adium5BE51F40 started.
(02:42:54 PM) John Joseph Bachir: that's the thing, he's doing both
(02:42:59 PM) John Joseph Bachir: tactile and visual
(02:43:13 PM) John Joseph Bachir: yeah he's definitely deaf, the brother is making weird noises
(02:43:44 PM) John Joseph Bachir: he also wrote out his order, in really really bad handwriting
(02:43:46 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: She may have partial--perhaps cognitive--blindness and deafness.
(02:43:47 PM) John Joseph Bachir: oh wait, maybe he is both
(02:43:58 PM) John Joseph Bachir: she was holding a cane
(02:44:05 PM) John Joseph Bachir: but maybe it was his cane and she was leading him in here
(02:44:09 PM) John Joseph Bachir: yeah it hink that's it
(02:44:37 PM) John Joseph Bachir: cognitive
(02:44:40 PM) John Joseph Bachir: intense
(02:45:52 PM) John Joseph Bachir: they are having a very emotional conversation
(02:45:56 PM) John Joseph Bachir: he sounds like a dolphin
(02:46:07 PM) John Joseph Bachir: and their hands are fling around
(02:46:21 PM) John Joseph Bachir: flying
(02:46:38 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: it would be some mixture of rude and creepy, but I kind of want you to take a video.
(02:46:55 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: Someday soon we'll just have retinal implants and you'll be all "Dude, check this out"
(02:47:09 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: We'll call it "melding" (like mind melding).
(02:47:11 PM) John Joseph Bachir: heh
(02:47:15 PM) John Joseph Bachir: nice
(02:47:16 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: It'll be the new texting.
(02:47:24 PM) John Joseph Bachir: iChatMeld
(02:47:29 PM) John Joseph Bachir: i wouldn't feel too rude about it if i just showed it to a couple linguistics-minded friends and then deleted it
(02:47:36 PM) John Joseph Bachir: but the woman is not blind so
(02:47:42 PM) John Joseph Bachir: that is not an option
(02:47:52 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: "No no, don't worry, it's for science!"
(02:47:56 PM) John Joseph Bachir: haha
(02:48:24 PM) John Joseph Bachir: i want to aproach them and make a documentary about them
(02:48:27 PM) John Joseph Bachir: actually.
(02:48:40 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: That's a hard conversation to start.
(02:48:42 PM) John Joseph Bachir: hahaha
(02:49:06 PM) John Joseph Bachir: man
(02:49:15 PM) John Joseph Bachir: the guys facial expressions and eye movement do not indicate that he is blind
(02:49:40 PM) John Joseph Bachir: i'll just take him by the shoulders and scream "WHAT ARE YOU"
(02:49:46 PM) John Joseph Bachir: you know, building bridges
(02:50:09 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: lol
(02:50:34 PM) John Joseph Bachir: and then i'll propose to them that we make some really awesome freaky kinky niche porn
(02:51:05 PM) John Joseph Bachir: and i'll close with "DID YOU THIKN YOU WERE JUST GOING TO COME HERE AND EAT PANCAKES LIKE NORAML PEOPLE?? HAHAHAHJA"
(02:52:01 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: heh. Man, so crazy that in 100 years, we'll have such a long tail in media that you'd be able to find that.
(02:52:13 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: Here's the thing, I like 'heh' and everything, and even 'lol', but I only ever send 'lol' if I actually produce an audible laugh. It's like I'm describing the event itself.
(02:52:33 PM) John Joseph Bachir: yeah
(02:52:37 PM) John Joseph Bachir: me too more or less
(02:52:45 PM) John Joseph Bachir: i use hahaha otherwise
(02:52:47 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: So rofl always annoyed me because it seemed like some kind of amusement cold war. Totally artificial.
(02:53:11 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: Man, it's so tempting to be snobbish about the stupidest shit.
(02:53:13 PM) John Joseph Bachir: the lady just walked to the bathroom like she is blind. BUT SHE WAS WATHCING HIS SIGNING
(02:53:13 PM) John Joseph Bachir: maybe she just has short range vision
(02:53:32 PM) John Joseph Bachir: hahahaha
(02:53:40 PM) John Joseph Bachir: yeah, rofl is rarely real
(02:58:02 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: I one actual rofl in my whole life. I was watching a movie at the dollar theater with my Dad. It was like a seizure. The laughing itself made laugh more until it became hard to breathe and I developed a sharp pain in my side. I was mostly hillarious, but I was slightly afraid I'd die. I kinda balled up from the pain and hillarity and fell out of the chair and was literally rolling the aisle with laughter... and suffocation. Then it burned itself out.
(02:58:22 PM) John Joseph Bachir: hahaha
(02:58:24 PM) John Joseph Bachir: what movie?
(02:58:27 PM) John Joseph Bachir: how old were you?
(02:58:44 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: Young. I'm trying to remember... I think it might have been "Weekend at Berny's"
(02:58:49 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: Bernie's?
(02:59:35 PM) John Joseph Bachir: sounds right
(03:00:08 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: We had to leave and get my asthma medicine. I remember thinking, "Man, I hope we get home before my airway's completely shut off, but also being a little bummed I wouldn't see the end of the movie.
(03:00:46 PM) John Joseph Bachir: hahaha
(03:00:54 PM) John Joseph Bachir: intense
(03:00:58 PM) John Joseph Bachir: reminds me of the bacon story
(03:01:04 PM) John Joseph Bachir: in which you also almost died
(03:01:23 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: I'm going to be so protective of my child.
(03:02:25 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: I'll be like, "Don't ever forget even for an instant that death can strike when you least expect it! Good night."
(03:02:32 PM) John Joseph Bachir: hahaha
(03:02:33 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: Sleep well!
(03:02:40 PM) John Joseph Bachir: that's so SMBC
(03:03:06 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: The setup's a bit of a long walk.
(03:03:28 PM) John Joseph Bachir: haha
(03:03:28 PM) John Joseph Bachir: yes
(03:03:46 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: I man, I had this long walk joke the other day. The punchline was "The Mayan Angelaus!" as the name of a soccer team.
(03:04:20 PM) John Joseph Bachir: hahahaha
(03:05:21 PM) John Joseph Bachir: you there?
(03:05:43 PM) John Joseph Bachir: connection dropped
(03:05:48 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: We saw this sign for our local team, the "Austin Aztex" and so I started talking how weird it was to appropriate this 6000 year old culture and make it the mascot of a tiny local soccer team
(03:06:00 PM) John Joseph Bachir: haha, yeah
(03:06:16 PM) John Joseph Bachir: Az"tex"
(03:06:19 PM) John Joseph Bachir: charming
(03:06:56 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: Not only that, but we didn'l even spell it right. Then I go on about the shame of having some shitty mascot go around and it'd probably be a mongrel mix of "Indian cultures"--whatever that means--with no actual Aztec symbology.
(03:10:33 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: Then the punchline came to me, and I thought, "How can I get there?" So I said something like, "How would you feel if an ancient civilization appropriated your culture and stuck together two things that didn't make sense, taking your proud heritage and reducing it below the level of poor caricature? You'd have the Mayan Angelous as a team in that game where they threw a goat head through a stone circle. Is that even real? Am I being racist? They'll get me back by having a jolly Maya Angelou mascot doing cartwheels during halftime.
(03:10:53 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: To understand this joke, you must simply break free of the notion of linear time!
(03:11:19 PM) John Joseph Bachir: hahahaha
(03:11:24 PM) John Joseph Bachir: i'm feeling it.
(03:11:31 PM) John Joseph Bachir: i think you are mixing the mayan game with the afganastan game
(03:11:45 PM) John Joseph Bachir: in afghanastan they essentially play polo with a stuffed goat instead of a ball
(03:12:01 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: I've seen those videos, crazy.
(03:12:02 PM) John Joseph Bachir: and in the mayan game they kick the ball through the hoop, and the winners get sacrificed
(03:12:11 PM) John Joseph Bachir: maybe the ball is a goat head, i don't know
(03:12:30 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: I do want to try fermented mare's milk, though.
(03:12:41 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: I wonder if I could find that anywhere.
(03:18:43 PM) John Joseph Bachir: i love that the architecture of the internet allows me to commit and deploy software from the wifi at this random diner
(03:19:04 PM) zanerock@gmail.com/Home2340E5B7: it's pretty amazing
(03:19:45 PM) John Joseph Bachir: what would be an anlogy... if say, the architecture of cable tv was just as flexible/open...
(03:20:05 PM) John Joseph Bachir: i could go to a random diner and if i was the only one watching the tv, turn it to...
(03:20:15 PM) John Joseph Bachir: a videofeed of my house
(03:20:19 PM) John Joseph Bachir: haha
(03:20:22 PM) John Joseph Bachir: yeah there is no analogy
(03:32:23 PM) John Joseph Bachir: changing locations BBL
